I know it can be challenging to balance all the things in your life… cleaning the house, organizing family activities, preparing the meals, running your business, raising kids and possibly working a full-time job on top of all that. Not to mention, all the things life throws at you unexpectedly. You have your hands full!
Today, I want to share 3 simple steps you can take to step towards living a more peaceful and balanced life.
1. Go easy on yourself.
Having such high expectations makes it very challenging for you. You feel you have to keep up with everything. That you can’t let anything slip. That you’re there to take care of others. That you have to be the one who does it all. After all, who’s going to do it if you don’t?
If I could give one piece of advice as a recovered task master, it’s to be kinder and gentler to yourself. You are wearing yourself out by trying to do too much. It’s just not necessary. In fact, if you stay on the path you’re on, you’re not going to have anything left to give. You are human after all. You are more than just a doer. You are a human BEING.
“Being” is about how we are showing up for ourselves and others. Are we being kind to ourselves? Are we being kind to others? They go hand-in-hand. We must be in a good mental state in order to be kind. We must be in a good mental state to be patient. And also to be at peace.
How do we create a good mental state consistently? Well, conveniently that leads us to step 2…
2. Set time aside daily for your mental wellbeing.
Having time to take care of yourself daily is a must. Doing things that nourish you mind, your body and your soul are all important. For you, that may be taking a nice bath, lighting some incense, going for a nice walk, reading an inspirational book, listening to your favorite podcast, praying or meditating. The point is to check in with yourself and ask, “What can I do today that would feel good?”
You may not know what would feel good in the beginning. This is your chance to discover. At first, you may feel you don’t have time to do this daily because you have so much to do. You may even feel guilty for taking time for yourself. What if I told you that taking time for yourself is the best thing you can do for not only for yourself but for others too?
This “me time” is about helping you to feel refreshed. When you’re refreshed, it’s easier to feel good. When you feel good, it’s easier to feel patient towards others and less cranky. It’s easier to think kind thoughts about yourself and others. It’s easier to feel centered and calm when sh** hits the fan.
So the key is to block time out on your calendar each day. Preferably, first thing in the morning. This allows you to start your day on a good note. This also demonstrates that your highest priority is you by putting your needs at the beginning of the day instead of at the end. Admit it, you’re notorious for making your needs last. Right? It’s time to reverse that. Otherwise, how can you take care of others if you can’t take care of yourself.
3. Notice what’s going right.
It’s easy to notice all the things that need to be fixed, all that needs to be repaired, all the problems that need to be solved. It’s also easy to notice all the things you feel you’re doing wrong or “should be” doing better. This part of ourselves, I like to call the “inner critic”. Your inner critic is really good at noticing everything that is essentially broken.
We’ve been taught this is a good thing. Growing up, our papers were graded, and we were shown our mistakes. Our parents were raised this way, so they too pointed out the things we needed to fix in order to be better. This isn’t about blaming anyone. This is just a prevalent part of our society. But, it causes a serious issue when all we can notice is everything that needs to be fixed and we can’t enjoy and be satisfied with what who we are and what we have.
The key to feeling good is to see what is right in any moment. To see what is right in ourselves. To see what is right in the people around us. What grows in our life depends on where our energy flows. Our energy flows to what we pay attention to. If we want more good in our lives, it is essential that we focus on the good the exists right now.
This is a universal law. Energy flows to where our attention goes. If you want more good, focus on the good you have all around you. In the flowers, the trees, the sky, the sun, your home, your family, your health. Anything that you find is good, notice it.
But, also notice the good that you are doing. Positive reinforcement of the steps you are taking daily to give to yourself and give to others is essential to motivate yourself to continue. If you go for a walk, acknowledge yourself and feel the good you are bringing to your health and wellbeing. If you took a lunch break, acknowledge yourself for pausing your day to eat well. If you made time to read an inspirational book, even if it’s one page, acknowledge that you made that time to feed your mind and your spirit. Feel good about that. It’s a step in the direction of feeling more balanced.
Ultimately, your health and wellbeing is up to you.
No hero is going to save you from wearing yourself out (I found that out the hard way). This is about You choosing to take care of you. That bigger part of you who knows you didn’t come to this life just so you could slave away. You came so that you could live your life fully. So that you enjoy all that this world has to offer. So take care of yourself so that you can take time to enjoy it. After all, you deserve to live a long and happy life. Your family and friends will be glad that you did.
Blessings,
Danielle